The Next Specialist

I think every family has one child that is prone to accidents.  It took our family until the 4th child until we got ours, but Chloe definitely qualifies.  Back in Nov., Chloe dislocated her elbow when I lifted her funny.  It was put back into place and healed quickly.  She has since dislocated it 2 more times in the last week.  The doctor at Stat Care made sure it was in place and put her arm in a sling.  She wore it for about 72hrs., sleeping and all.  We got the okay from our pediatrician to take it off, but tomorrow we see a pediatric orthopedic doctor to see if the ligaments have had too much damage and need to be repaired.  Lets hope not.  It was pretty funny to watch her adapt to using only her left arm.  Not much fazed her except going to the bathroom.  That one she never quite figured out how to do on her on.

We celebrated an 8th Grade Graduation in our family.  It's hard to believe we will have one High School soon.

Chloe loves to sing when her big sister practices guitar.

Do you see the resemblance?

 
Chloe got to go along to the zoo on a home school field trip.  It was rainy, but fun.  I couldn't bring myself to post the pictures of Chloe petting the snake.  They just gave me the shivers.

Mother's Day

   It's great to have a day that honors what moms do, but it's also a good reminder to me to be thankful for the girls I have been given.   So often I get distracted by the struggles and how to fix them.  I am truly blessed with my 4 beauties!

   We have a family tradition that we have a food art competition when we celebrate Easter with my family.  We take a variety food items and arrange them on a plate using squeeze icing as glue to make a picture.  It's all just for fun.  Chloe really got into it this year and I thought I'd share her own little creation.  The theme this year was the zoo.  Can't you see it? ;)

Three year olds are so fun to watch coloring Easter eggs!  It takes very little to make her squeal.

   Our older daughter played "minute to win it" for her birthday party last week.  One of the games involved throwing rolls of toilet paper.  Chloe had a great time retrieving all the "misses" and running them back for another try.  Who knew someone so little could carry soooo many rolls of toilet paper?  Who needs toys to have fun?

   Chloe has gotten into doing her own hair "like her big sisters."  She has learned to put rubber bands in all by herself.  What she doesn't realize is that she misses the back completely.  We had been watching America's Next Top Model the other night, so Chloe got all dressed up in her swimsuit, did her hair, and proceeded to pose for her photo shoot :)

   This would be the mad side of Chloe that still shows up often.  She's working through her life story dealing with the mad emotion now.  Unfortunately, we are the ones who get the brunt of her anger.  Thankfully this too shall pass as healing comes.  Please keep praying.

What's Up Next?

    Chloe got into the action kneading the dough for cinnamon rolls.

  Lots has been happening with Chloe lately.  First of all, Praise the Lord, we got funding for a neuro feedback machine in our home.  I started learning how to operate the system at our last therapy session and it should be up and running by the end of next week.  I am anxious to see how much more effective it will be when it's used more often.

    Chloe has begun to see a speech therapist.  The clarity of her speech has been a concern for a while, but we've had a difficult time finding a therapist that recognizes the importance of early speech intervention for a child without an established first language like Chloe.  Thankfully, we found Concorde Kids through a friend of ours and they work with many adoptive kids.  Chloe is able to pronounce most of her letters, but when she speaks in a conversation, she leaves out middle syllable sounds.  Instead of ki-tt-en, she will say ki-en.  This will require weekly trips about an hour away.  Thankfully, it isbe covered by our insurance because Chloe had trouble with her ears as a baby.

    Also at Concorde Kids, Chloe saw an occupational therapist to test for Sensory Processing Disorder.  We have been suspicious that Chloe had this problem for some time, but chose to work on other things first.  Her symptoms include lots of climbing and crashing with no fear, smelling lots of things, and lots of rubbing on my skin.  You may remember that last fall Chloe dislocated her elbow and gave no indication of pain.  Lack of pain recognition seems like the most serious problem and our real motivation for having her assessed.  Sensory Disorder in orphanage kids comes from lack of stimulation.  They lay in a crib staring at the ceiling with little or no stimulation.  Now Chloe literally craves stimulation, both in touch and in joint compression (crashing).  Once we fulfill her need and fill her tank so to speak, her craving for stimulation will come down to a normal level.  Weekly trips to O.T. with lots of crashing and stimulation should help greatly.  If you have questions about Sensory Disorder feel free to email me at  thebeachfamily@cs.com

Won't You Be My Love

  When the going gets tough as an adoptive parent, it can be tough to keep looking at the "bigger picture."  I heard a song yesterday that helped me refocus my perspective.  It's all about giving a lost child the freedom to know Jesus for eternity.  Click the link to the song below and listen especially to the 2nd verse.  I hope it's an encouragement to you too.

You Tube: Won't You Be My Love by Mercy Me

Adoption Issues Blog

I have spent a lot of time on this blog talking about attachment and now I would like to begin sharing blog entries from Chloe attachment therapist, Arleta James.  Adoption and attachment issues are very complicated and vary from child to child.  I hope it will be helpful to other adoptive parents who struggle to show love to their kids each day.   Perscriptives on Challenged Family Building

Mr & Mrs Beach

   It is not uncommon for an adoptive child to get angry with their parents and blame them for taking them away from their birth  parent(s).  Because they don't understand the reality of abandonment, the truth is twisted and the rescuing parents become the "bad guys." 
   Chloe had been on a slippery downhill slope of regression ever since we missed a session of her neuro feedback, the brainwave treatment that I have spoken about that's part of her ongoing therapy.  It all came to a head last week when a very angry, stubborn Chloe had therapy.  Arleta, Chloe's attachment therapist,  proceeded to tell her that she needed to listen to Mom and Dad and act like a family girl.  Chloe seemed very angry and refused to speak, so Arleta talked to her about her life story, a sort of time line of events beginning with her abandonment and progressing to when she was adopted and traveled to America.  As we talk about how she must have felt throughout this timeline, something will often trigger an emotion for Chloe.  Her face may get red with anger or tears will well up in her eyes, sometimes her forehead will furrow or she'll start breathing quickly.  Suffice it to say, it is always very obvious when we've hit on the right area of trouble.
   On a previous visit, Chloe had been very angry when she was told she was not going to live in China again.  We knew this issue was still unresolved.  Arleta asked Chloe if Mommy and Daddy were important to her (in an effort to motivate to make better choices).  Chloe promptly said no we were not and when Arleta asked her to tell us, she sat up, looked each of us in the eye and said, "You are not important to me."  The consequence she was given by Arleta, since we were not important to her, was that we were Mr & Mrs Beach to Chloe instead of Mom and Dad.  This meant we still took care of her, but she did not get special loving privileges of being part of the family, candy, fun toys, choices, etc. since she rejected the family. 
   Chloe continued to call us Mr & Mrs Beach and refuse to be part of the family for almost 3 days.  Occasionally we would ask her if she had decided yet to be part of the family and she would just say no.  Finally, Sunday night, Greg was putting Chloe to bed and asked her once again if she wanted to be a part of the family.  She smiled and said yes.  Chloe then went on to tell both Greg and I that we are important to her and that she loved us.  Once again our sweet, kind-hearted Chloe was back.  She had let go of all the anger and had come to a place of acceptance again.  What a relief to be back to "normal."  Arleta did say it usually takes two times of this happening for it to really stick, so at some point I will probably have to be Mrs Beach again. :(
     On a lighter note, we celebrated Chinese New Year as a family a few weeks ago and here are some pictures.

Chloe's working on mastering her chopsticks.  The little guy at the top holds them together to make it easier to learn.  I think I need some like that. :)

Sleigh Ride at the Exotic Animal Farm

We got to spend the wknd with the Brown family, our adoptive friends.  There is an exotic animal petting farm a few minutes from our house, so we took an amazing sleigh ride through the animals.

We all huddled under very warm blankets and slipped and slid over the hills to feed the animals.

Chloe loved feeding the llamas and one of us even got caught in the spitting crossfire.

We got to meet George the 17ft. daddy giraffe in the barn where he was staying with about 6 other giraffes.  He was huge!  This is a 2nd story platform we're standing on to see him eye to eye.

While we waited for the sleighs to arrive, we got to visit with a baby zebra and giraffe.  What an amazing experience!

We spent the rest of the wknd at a hotel with the Browns and enjoyed catching up.  The girls got to go swimming and just had fun playing tag and hiding from everyone.

Alexandria and Chloe were orphanage buddies.

Chloe discovered goggles for the first time and is now swimming around with her head under the water.

What a fish!  A little fear could be a good thing too :)